Thursday, February 10, 2011

HIPSTER RUNOFF

HIPSTER RUNOFF

The iPad DJ broad returns, brags abt her life, has 'totally alt' pink streak in her hair

Posted: 10 Feb 2011 03:38 PM PST

Remember the iPad DJ? [link] Her name is Rana Sobhany, and her gimmick is 'getting covered by tech blogs' because she is a woman who pretends to DJ from the iPad. Anyways, she has a new video where she keeps repeating herself abt how she is inspired

Anyways, some tech blogger dude basically oggles at her goodies during the interview, and probably asked her out on a date afterwards. "We share the same passions. Technology. Apps. Pads. Social Media. And streaks of a bright colour in our hair."
ipad DJ
She basically just rambles on abt how great she is and how she loves iPads and apps and portability and her awesome new DJing career. I am not sure, but I think I saw her on the 3rd draft of the Coachella flyer.

Here is the crap she brags abt in the video:

  • She has done 75 shows in the past 7 months
  • in 5 countries
  • for 100,000 people
  • with just 2 iPads
  • Cool places she has played
  • House of Blues, Webster Hall, Apple Stores in NYC + SF,
  • Show at Google coming up

"Blah Blah Blah Read my new book called Mobilize! It is abt apps"

R u gonna read this book, or would u rather eat ur own poop?
Is the iPad DJ 'living a lie'?

Just gonna re-embed her music video so yall remember why 2 h8 her.

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Should I book the iPad DJ at my relevant SXSW partie?
Are you one of the 100k people who have seen the iPad DJ play 'live'?
Do yall hate 'tech ass holes' from 'the Valley' who are just trying to 'spin deals' and invent 'the next Groupon app twitter content hub'?
Has the iPad DJ 'successfully leveraged social media to expose her brand to the masses'?
Will the iPad DJ get above a 9.0 on Pitchfork for her next album?
Should I get a pink streak in my hair 2 'look more alt' [via the 1990s]?

Levi's designs new skinny jeans called "ex-girlfriend jeans"

Posted: 10 Feb 2011 01:28 PM PST

Link: http://us.levi.com/product/index.jsp?productId=10911925&ab=020711&Camp=CME:NewFits:20110207&csm=184349530&csc=283485&csa=184343222&csu=284145&cp=3146842.4305630.3378777


Levi's is a popular mainstream / alternative jeans + denim company that makes various styles of jeans for all types of humans. Fat, skinny. Alt, mainstream. Bros, broads. Tweens, grown ass men. Anyways, we're living in the modern consumer landscape where retailers have to 'memefy' their products in order to drive traffic to their website. Levi's created the Ex-Girlfriend Jean just 2 ride the hipster bashing alt blog meme wave.

Are yall gonna buy these skinny jeans, or are they too skinny?
Would u rather just buy girl jeans?
Are skinny jeans still alt?

Remember the girlfriend with the great style? Here's a tribute to her -- a fit that's super-snug allover, an update of the five-pocket classic that's as skinny as it gets. Made with plenty of stretch. This pair of Levi's® Jeans is part of our program that minimizes water in the finishing process. Country Of Origin: Imported

WAIST: Sits below waist, 10" rise
FIT: Super Skinny Fit
LEG: Skinny, 13 1/4" leg opening

R u gonna buy these jeans, or do u still just wear Gap Khaki's [via the 1990s]?

What happens if ur GF is actually a mom? [via mom jeans]?

What happens if ur dating a transvestite-wave human who is transitioning from female to male and she wears big baggy jeans to look like a ghetto dude?

Are you going 2 buy 'ex-GF' jeans?

Do yall remember the 'slept over at my BF's house big shirt'? [link]

Do u fit in2 ur GF's jeans?
Are 'girl jeans' still alt, or are they more of a Hot Topic emo trend now?
What pants do u wear?
R u skinnie?
Is ur GF 'mad hefty'?
Will Levi's 'sell out' of these jeans?
Have u ever stolen any property from ur exGF?
Do u retain possession of ur exBF's property?
Do u buy Levi's jeans, or are they 4 lamestreamers?

Some 'effing hipster' performance artist eats her own poop in order 2 try to be alt

Posted: 10 Feb 2011 10:39 AM PST

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I'll never forget the time some female performance artist 'went viral' for varting/squirting spaghettios out of her vagina [link]. Now it seems like some new 'totally alt performance artist' has attempted to one-up her by snacking on her own poo. I am not sure if this even takes place at a formal gallery, or if it is just one of those think pieces that is seem 'live' in public where you don't even know what you're watching. Like a 1 person flash mob or something.

It appears to seem as if like this alt hipster woman continues to poop directly into her hand. She brings her hand to her face with bite sized pieces of turds and enjoys one turd after the other. A blipster family next to her is laughing their asses off, but they are 'having their reality challenged' by this progressive performance artist who wants them to think, "What if humans ate something that their own body produced?"

I am rlly worried that Poo_Alts are gonna 'be big' in 2k12. It must be part of some new organic/vegan post-Whole Foods Movement. Every1 is trying to prove that they eat food that 'comes from the Earth.'

Do u think this 'effing hipster' has 'gone too far' to try to be alt?
Is this a 'hipster' or just an 'insane ass woman'?
If u were a blipster, would u laugh at this woman?
How far will performance artists continue to go?
Do performance artists really care abt 'art' or do they just want 2 be sensational?
Should Whole Foods and Trader Joe's start selling human poo to authentic meta-organic post-vegans?
Have yall ever eaten ur own poo?
eating your own poo

Guitar Hero taken off the market cuz no1 buys it any more

Posted: 10 Feb 2011 06:53 AM PST

Link: http://musically.com/blog/2011/02/09/guitar-hero-axed-by-activision-due-to-declining-sales/


Apparently, no1 buys that Guitar Hero bullshit any more, so they decided to 'fold' the franchise. I wonder if it just 'isn't in demand', or if they basically hit the 100% threshold of the market for 'losers who would actually buy a game that you needed a fake little plastic guitar that would end up chillin in ur living room and u would think that the lil guitar made you look cool.' Don't really understand the appeal of video games when u can play 'the game of life' every day. Also 'becoming a buzzband' is kinda like a video game/RPG if u rlly think about it, so I would rather play that game + press buttons on a sampler as opposed to a fake plastic guitar.

Anyways, Guitar Hero is 'dead' (until they decide to re-release it with a redesigned controller that every1 has to buy all over again).

“Due to continued declines in the music genre, the company will disband Activision Publishing’s Guitar Hero business unit and discontinue development on its Guitar Hero game for 2011,” explains the company in its latest financials, as reported by MCV.

The publisher is also suspending development on its DJ Hero franchise, having confirmed that its ‘peripheral-based’ console games – which also include Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater – sold less copies than expected in 2010.

Does this news make u sad?
Did yall think that Rock Band was gonna 'save the music industry'?
Is Rock Band the 'lamest' game in the entire world?

Miss u DJ Hero [via silent flops]

Don't worry, yall. Rock Band is totally 'in the shitter' too.

The news comes shortly after Viacom sold Harmonix, the team behind the Rock Band games. Its decision to sell was seen as evidence that the music game genre has lost its lustre – something compounded by today’s news.

Gonna miss u music genre...
Do u think all of the lamestreamers who played Rock Band will try to sell the
Will Rock Band / Guitar Hero become 'ironic/vintage' in _ years, or will it just be 'straight up lame'?
What are the popular video games of the 2k10s?
How did the Rock Band / Guitar Hero franchise 'go wrong'?
Did u ever throw a sweet partie where ppl played one of these games the whole time?
Do u feel bad for ppl who thought these games and the music on them were hella sweet?

CARLES'S TOP 8 LAMESTREAM ROCK BAND + GUITAR HERO MOMENTS OF HIS LIFE

10. Chillin with kewl video game bros who look like they are in alt rock bands.

9. The time I played against Tony Romo

8. The time my mom played Guitar Hero and I drank a Diet Dr Pepper

7. The time I invited ever1 over 2 partie, and played guitar hero and made every1 watch me for 5 hours, and when any1 else tried to play, I just kicked their ass and made it un-fun

6. The time my little brother 'kicked my ass' at Rock Band, but then we bonded for the first time in years and beat the game together

5. The time I took my Rock Band to my grandparents' retirement community to help fight Alzheimer's

4. The time South Park 'parodied' Guitar Hero 4 being dumb and it was really funnie but then I still kept playing it anyways cuz I partied with my bffs

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3. The Time I beat Accordion Hero

2. The time I played a classic Southern Rock song on guitar hero and 'thought I was actually playing' the song and visualized myself on tour with the band and banging bitches

1. The time I was me and I was a bad ass and I crushed it while playing Guitar Hero and Rock Band at the same time.

What are yalls fave guitar hero moments?

UNCOVERED: James Blake's hit song rips off pre-existing song. Should we hold it against him?

Posted: 10 Feb 2011 06:06 AM PST

Link: http://www.abeano.com/blog/james-blake-a-case-of-you-joni-mitchell-cover
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James Blake has a hit song called "The Wilhelm Scream." He recently received a 9.0 from the popular music website Pitchfork Media [link], and he is widely known as 'The Prince of Dubstep.' However, it seems like there is a blemish on his 9.0 trophy after he admitted that he 'ripped off' the song from a song called "Where to Turn" by James Litherland. I wonder if James Litherland has a Google Alert setup for James Blake's name, and is waiting to drop a 'big ass lawsuit' after his first week album sales numbers come back.

As he’s hinted at over the last few weeks, the melody of ‘The Wilhelm Scream’ is borrowed from something his father produced, the James Litherland track ‘Where to Turn’. “This is the track that spurred on The Wilhelm Scream” he explained “It was a track that I grew up listening to because my dad was producing it. It was going around the house for weeks. It became a song for me as well so I think it’s time people heard the original”

Can u hear the direct similarities? Did James Blake 'straight up jack' this song?

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"I would expect this kind of ripping off from a chillwaver, but not from some1 getting so much high level buzz."

Does James Blake only make sample based music?
Does he really deserve to be buzzworthy since his best 2 songs are basically 'covers'? [via Feist's "Limit to Your Love"]

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Is it time to 'rethink' the James Blake buzzwagon?
Is the original song just some honky white person music?
Is it chill 2 'rip off' pre-existing songs, or should the artist be required 2 do a little bit more remixing?
Do all modern buzzbands just 'rip off' old bands that wrote poppier hits?
Is James Blake a liar and a crook?

Is this the first big buzz scandal of 2k11?
R u disappointed in James Blake?
Is there any way to 'return' a buzzband to the UK, and say that they are 'damaged goods' + get a 100% refund?
Do u feel sad 4 James Litherland?

Is "The Wilhelm Scream" the mp3 of the year, or will this uncovered bit of info 'ruin' James Blake's legacy?
Do u care when a song is 'sample based'/rips off a pre-existing song, or is it the role of a modern artist to re-adapt old, irrelevant sounds 2 be relevant?

Double D8 With my Bro: Grindfest 2k11--Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Bros Now

Posted: 09 Feb 2011 07:46 PM PST

Photo via Brooklyn Vegan

hornie bros grinding on girls
I gotta a feeling...
that 2nite's gonna be a good nite...
that 2nite's gonna be a Black Eyed Pea-esque nite...
That 2nite's gonna be a bro bro nite

"Yeah, me and Randy will be by to pick you guys up at 7."
///and then we're gonna grind the fuck out of yall at da club
"Yeah, we're borrowing Randy's Dad's Beamer. Hells yeah!"
///and then we're gonna grind the fuck out of yall at da club

"Randy bro...U think we'll get lucky 2nite?"
"I am a firm believer in creating destiny."
"What does that mean, Randy?"
"Tonight we're going hard."
"Should I raid my dad's liquor cabinet?"
"Fuck yeah! Get the flavored vodka. We'll mix it into Icees from 7-11"
"We are fucking geniuses."
"Our bitches are gonna go HARD with us."
"Nothin's gonna stop us... Nothin's gonna stop us now."

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So there we were
Grinding the eff out of our broads
Grinding my hard lil peen
in2 the middle of her back/butt cheeks

and Randy was right...
We were creating our own destiny
I looked over at Randy, grinding so hard
In complete hornie tween ecstasy

And we Eiffel Towered the fuck out of our bitches
We were pimp ass mack daddies
We went back to a motel on the outskirts of town
and made love 2 our women
on neighboring queen beds in the same room

It was a good nite for me and Randbro...
A real good, good nite...

"Nothing's gonna effing stop us now."