On the 1st/2nd/3rd/4th/5th/6th/7th/8th/9th/10th/11rd/12th/13st/69th day of Xmas, my true alt gave 2 me:
a) one copy of Tomboy b) 2 gaggles of AZNs [link] c) 1 Unchill Azn Bro d) 2 full sized Alice Glass posters e) crack f) 'AnCo vinyl records' g) Miscellaneous alt alcoholic beverage h) a blogspot i) ten 10.0s j) an entry level alt k) 2 tix 2 a relevant music festival l) A weekend on the Vampy Weeks cruise, departing from New Orleans on July 22, 2042 m) a job at Am Appy n) an internship at Urby Outties o) a worthless 20something former altbro 2 smoke dank with p) an [apple product] q) an [android phone] r) a residency at a vegan bakery s) 1 scholarship to an auto-acceptance design school t) an all expenses paid getaway to a resort in Brooklyn u) an all expenses paid jungle safari 2 Laptopistan [link] v) Netflix [via lamestreamers] w) a pair of TOMS 2 wipe ur ass with x) a couple of GROUPONS [via poor+middleclass ppl] y) an all expenses paid stint living in ur parents house until u r 30 years old z) Choose ur own Xmas Wish
What r u getting 4 Christmas? Do u believe in Santa Clausbro? Are these alts 'totally authentic'? Do they make u yearn for the glory days of 'hipster bashing' between 2k3-2k7? Do u sing some sort of 'effing hipster' video abt the 12 days of Xmas? Do u h8 visiting home? Do ur parents 'get' ur personal brand? Have u been running into any 'totally inauthentic exGFs/exBFs while u have been at home visiting ur parents who make u sad bc they live an inauthentic life'? Did u get ur parents any sweet alternative CDs for xmas bc they will be able to relate to their 'vintage lofi pop sound'? What is ur Xmas like?
