So many men Are into 'tits', 'breasts', 'knockers', 'gargonzolas' or 'asses', 'butts', 'cans', 'rumps', 'poopers' But I kinnda want to be in2 something more alt
A body part that is rlly authentic Represents dedication to your personal brand Any1 can get 'tit implants' or even 'ass implants [via Kim Kardash]
Lately I've been really in2 girls with amazing backbone definition U can see every bone in the spine Making u wonder 'how do they preserve their body with 0% body fat'? 'Is that even healthy?' but then ur like 'who cares?'
Ur giving up 'big tits' and 'a round-ass ass' when u go 4 a skinny girl but thinking of that sexy backbone is all u need 2 get by 2 'get u off'
Wonder if it is more difficult to find a girl with a nice backbone than it is 2 find a girl with a 'nice tits' / 'a nice ass' Will we evr find the perfect alternative breasts? or even discover the perfect alternative ass?
'Hip definition' seems chill, too
but there's nothing as metaphorically as 'sexy' as a girl with a nice backbone A girl with a solid support system Structurally-sound A QT who can literally 'stand up 4 herself'
Oh backbone girl Not sure how u did it But u made me realize that 'tits and asses' are overrated Do backbones 'turn u on'? R u hornie 4 backbones? Are 1 piece floral print bathing suits gonna be 'huge' this winter? Is objectifying a woman with tits + ass = mnstrm? What is the sexiest body part on a female? Is it 'unsexy' whenever a girl has a backbone/spine that is 'too defined' or does it demonstrate that they are dedicated 2 being skinny?
It's so sillie living in the modern world where every1 steals music and entities that create/sell music can't really make as much money any more. However, some businesses/humans/online websites still try to 'sell music' even though it "isn't as profitable as it should be." Sorta 'dont' rlly care' abt who is making money via the music industry just as long as I get free, buzzworthy MP3s.
Some website made a list of 100 'not so fucked' music companies. Just the usual 'listing' gimmick to 'open up discussions' by throwing as many famous humans/services/websites on a list then letting people be all like "oh yeah this is interesting I rlly care abt musicians being compensated 4 creating art."
Well, here's a list of companies (or divisions of companies, entities, performers, innovators, etc.) that are not-so-f*ked. In fact, they're likely to still be here in five years – and quite possibly, they'll be shaping the next-generation music industry.
Here is the list + analysis
1. Apple -heard they invented iPods and iPhones and 'screw over' artists 2. Apple Corps. - wonder what the difference between APPLE AND APP CORPIE is 3. Spotify - Not sure if they have this in America 4. Pandora - "I love listening to the _____ Pandora Station. It is s000 g00d at identifying similar hits." 5. BMG Rights Management - Who the eff is this 6. Frontline Management Group - Nvr heard of them 7. Universal Music Group - Sounds like a major label. Bet they are effed. 8. Google Music - Hope Google Music pays artists 90% of profits/replaces iTunes and continues to 'screw ovr' artists/labels 9. YouTube - Really enjoy streaming songs from youtube 1x instead of buying the mp3 for 4evr 10. Facebook - Great service for discovering buzzbands via ur friends via wall-2-walls 11. Kanye West - Do u think this is because he has tons of buzzbucks [via 10.0]? 12. EMI Music Publishing - Sounds like a major label. Bet they are fucked 13. BigChampagne - Sounds like some dumb internet service that does something stupid 14. Sirius XM Radio - 'This is a great product. Check out HIPSTER RUNOFF blog radio every Monday at Noon and Midnight Eastern.' 15. Topspin - Sounds like some online company that will eventually just be acquired by google/apple/pandora/myspace/lala/imeem. 16. Clear Channel Radio - <3 driving around listening to the mainstream radio 17. Android - Hope there is an Android platform on the new iPhone 18. MTV Networks - Not sure MTV is really into 'music.' Think the future of music is Jersey Shores and Poor Teens Getting Pregnant. 19. Twitter - Can't wait for twitter to let me 'add a song to my profile' 20. ReverbNation - sounds like a message board 4 lamestreamers. 21. Anonymous - is this the 4chans?
Pictured: Graph abt the music industry that may or may not be relevant but is supposed 2 look interesting
22. Berklee College of Music - One of my bros went there to 'master' the [dumb instrument] and now he is unemployed but is really good at [dumb, obscure instrument] 23. Rightsflow - Sounds like something that is supposed to keep albums from leaking. 24. CD Baby - Sounds like an iTunes portal that is 'so simple, even a baby can use it' [via mp3s for babies sales] 25. Music Reports, Inc. -- Sounds 'really serious', like Reports abt Music 26. Smule - Wonder if this is a human or some sort of bullshit service 27. Sonicbids - hope this is like some sort of 'ebay for mp3s' where u bid on mp3s 28. Pitchfork - Feel like it is way better to be a 'blog/website abt music' than to actually be a musician 29. The Hype Machine - Feels like it is better to be an 'aggregator of blogs' than 2 be an actual blog 30. Fuse - I think I have this crappy music channel 31. Vevo - wonder if they have effectively monetized youtube videos 32. CBS Radio - The Radio is the future of music 33. Disney Music Group - Heard they invented high school musicals 34. Avid Technology (Pro Tools) - I used Pro Tools 2 record my buzzyband 35. Rovi - Sounds like the name of a little Jewish boy 36. TuneCore - is this the new MP3 streaming browser created by WinAmp 37. Amoeba Music - sounds like a kewl 38. The Agency Group - sounds like an agency group 39. Antares Audio Technologies (maker of Autotune) - Wish I had invented autotune :-( 40. Combating Online Infringement and Counterfeits Act (COICA) - Sounds like unchill bros who police leaks 41. Creative Commons - not sure what this is, but sounds like it doesn't make money 42. Trent Reznor - heard he is in a buzzband 43. Sonos - Sounds like the knickname 44. David Shapiro Lewit & Hayes - Sounds like some 'high powered Jewish Lawyers' 45. The Copyleft - is this a kewl mtv2 alt rock buzzband?
Pictured: Graph abt the music industry that may or may not be relevant but is supposed 2 look interesting
46. SXSW - heard this is where buzzbands are invented every year 47. Merlin - sounds like a 'music discovery wizard' that has a long white beard 48. Domino Records - Must be because Animal Collective is on their label 49. Goldenvoice/AEG Live - wonder if they do sweet '360 deals' 50. Coachella - Wish I had started a relevant music festival 10-20 years ago 51. The Michael Jackson Estate - 'We have been making Money off MJ for the last _ years.' 52. Bonnaroo - heard this is like Coachella 4 hicks who like jam bands and alt rock bands 53. Arcade Fire - Bet they are gonna 'try to pull a radiohead' and release albums 4 free/donation 2 haiti in the future. 54. TDC's Play (Denmark) - no idea 55. Festival Republic (Reading & Leeds Festivals) 56. The Metropolitan Opera - 'Boring music is still relevant 57. Howard Stern - not sure what he has 2 do with music any more 58. Amazon MP3 - Great way 2 impulse buy DRM-free music 59. Metric - Do they mean the band Metric or is this some sort of 60. KCRW - some radio station that is 'respected' by cool dad markets like NPR or something 61. Big Machine Records - No idea what this is 62. Sony/ATV Music Publishing - sounds like it is gonna fail 63. Electronic Frontier Foundation - sounds pointless/dumb 64. UStream - thought this was for tweens to get naked on 65. Ford (see #4) - Might buy a Ford Truck 2 support the music industry 66. Concord Music Group -is this the company that makes Shazam? 67. Naxos - sounds like the name of a small Greek Boy 68. Taylor Swift - as long as she keeps dating famous ppl then writing songs abt the breakup she'll be fine
Pictured: Graph abt the music industry that may or may not be relevant but is supposed 2 look interesting
69. INgrooves (see #7) - is this the company that makes Shazam? 70. Music Hack Day - wonder if 'Record Store Day' is 71. The PROs: ASCAP, BMI, SESAC… - sounds like Garbage management companies 72. [Insert Torrent Tracker Here] - 73. Rapidshare - great place 2 illegally download albums. Might be more into mediafire though [via no wait time] 74. Radiohead - 'They released in_Rainbows 4 free and still made money!' 75. iBiquity - onder if this is the company that makes Shazam 76. Snoop Dogg - Probs just another rapper with a major label deal 77. Touchtunes - wonder if this is iTunes for the iPad 78. Chop Shop Music Supervision - no idea wtf this shit is 79. Bob Lefsetz - Some 'music industry insider/critic' who says obvious shit and doesn't even have a blog, just has a 'mailing list' 80. Soundcloud - great way to embed illegal mp3s 81. New Orleans - 'They play jazz music there' 82. Weezer - 'They are rlly innovative and reaching tween markets by appearing in youtube videos' 83. Gathering of the Juggalos - 'Juggalos are gonna be a really marketable meme going forward' -Jersey Shore's 1.4 season lifespan 84. ISPs - wtf does this even mean? Think they send u mean emails threatening 2 sue u when u download something illegal
Pictured: Graph abt the music industry that may or may not be relevant but is supposed 2 look interesting
85. Gibson Guitar - 'We make gitties, yall. We sell them 2 ppl who think they are going to be rock stars' 86. Musician's Friend - Wonder if this means 'the bff of every1 musician in the world' 87. NPR Music - 'They are a great way to reach an audience of cool dads who buy shit off iTunes' 88. Getty Images (Pump Audio) - Not sure what images have 2 do with mp3s 89. Outside Lands - sounds like a place for dead buzzbands 2 go 90. Gene Simmons - heard 50% of KISS is gonna die in 2-4 years 91. Glee - 'such a progressive way to introduce mainstreamers 2 kewl music' 92. AT&T - Can't wait til Apple is like 'we dont need u' and iPhones go 2 tmobile 93. Music Choice - is this the thing where there are 'radio stations on ur TV'? 94. ClickandBuy - sounds like an innovative online service 95. Gracenote - is this a way 2 96. RoyaltyShare - 'sounds like a great way to divide profits 4 buzzbands' 97. Music Mastermind - wonder if this is the company that makes Shazam 98. Ultimate Guitar Tabs Archive - 'I learned the tabs 2 TEARS IN HEAVEN' [via would u know my name if I saw u in heaven?]
99. Sennheiser - heard they make 'really sweet headphones' 100. The Consumer - 'U HAVE SO MUCH POWER' - a magazine trying 2 make u feel like u have power
Do u think these companies will all be around in 1, 5, 10, 50 or 100 years? Are all of these companies/humans 'relevant'? are they all 'rlly stupid'? Is iTunes a digital music cyber bully? Is PING going to be 'successful'? Can GROUPON sell mp3s at discount prices for local bands? What are the most innovative music companies? Is Last.fm 'pissed' 4 being left off the list? Do all large social networks have a great chance to take ovr the music industry? Are 'major labels' effed? Is Radiohead 'overrated' as a digital music pioneer? Are all new buzzbands (post-2k9) completely 'fucked'? Do u like graphs that show 'trends' in 'digital music'/'the music industry'? Is this list 'mad stupid'?
