Tuesday, October 26, 2010

HIPSTER RUNOFF

HIPSTER RUNOFF

BREAKING: The Emo Old Dude from the Cure joins Crystal Castles, creates new MP3

Posted: 26 Oct 2010 01:28 PM PDT

Link: http://pitchfork.com/forkcast/15005-not-in-love-ft-robert-smith/

The Cure is a popular band from the 80s that sang dark songs about relationships / not being good enough 4 any1, so every1 who was insecure + moderately alt in the 1980s vibed out hard to them. They also had some mainstream pop songs that every1 loved. Robert Smith is known as the 'mastermind' of The Cure.

Anyways, this is some new MP3 called "Not in Love" that was originally on Crystal Castles' second album, but now they went ahead and let Bob Smith sing over it. U gotta give them props for not thinking this was a corny idea, and just going ahead and letting Bob Smith churn out a new meme for them to cross over in2 new markets. Feel like this mp3 'crushes it', and might be a contender for 'MP3 of the year' from blogs all around the world.

However, I'm kinda worried. Do u think they are going to kick out Alice Glass/diminish her role within the band? Do u think Robert Smith will go on tour with Crystal Castles? Is Bobbie Smith trying to become a relevant buzzworthy indie celeb?

Does the new MP3 'crush it'?
Did the Cure / Crystal Castles save 2k10?
Is Crystal Castles the band of the year just based on this MP3?
Does Crystal Castles sound better with Alice Glass or Robert Smith?
Do u <3 Bobbie Smith's brand, or does he seem like a creepy emo 40 year old who lives at home with his parents and works at a soft pretzel shop at the mall?

Does the new Daft Punk mp3 sound like a crappy Justice MP3?

Posted: 26 Oct 2010 12:44 PM PDT

I remember when it was announced that Daft Punk was going to 'score' the TRON movie remake, every1 was 'creaming their pants' because TRON is 'ironic' and Daft Punk 'kills it', so it would be a meme that we could blog about forever.

Now the moment is finally here and I'm listening 2 this new song by Daft Punks called "Derezzed" and it seems pretty 'whatever.' Totesally not vibing to it at all. It sounds like it is 'too techno' 4 me, and I think of Dafties as some sort of bridge between 'pop music' and 'French House dance music.' I guess they are just cashing in or something. Have a feeling that this movie is going to be a huge flop and is going to lose a lot of money, but just as long as Daft Punk got paid, it'll probably be chill.

Honestly feel like the song sounds like a 'crappy Justice MP3', like there should be more BANGER in it, or some really rowdy filters masking how obvious/boring it is, then u can just say it is HARD.

R u 'excited' by Daft Punk's re-emergence with TRON?
Is TRON going to 'blow'?
Does it look like it is trying too hard to create a high-grossing film PLUS a cult classic?
Did Daft Punk 'peak' with Discovery? Should they just stay retired?
Do yall hope Justice comes out with a new MP3 soon?
Should Justice dress like robots to try to steal some of Daft Punk's market share?

PHOTO: Steve Aoki parties hard with MiniMe [via Verne Troyer]

Posted: 26 Oct 2010 11:37 AM PDT


Steve Aoki is a popular nightlife DJ who used to be alt, but is sorta just making mad bank off mainstreamers/international audiences who vibe out to his brand. Really don't even know if he is 'alt-relevant' any more, or if he is just a moderately bloggable DJing personality.

Anyways, it seems like Steve Aoki 'partied' with Verne Troyer, aka the lil actor who played Mini-Me in the popular film franchise: Austin Powers--so zany and funnnie.

Seems like they are bros, throwing down peace signs, etc.

Did Verne Troyer's career 'peak' when he played Mini-Me?
Will he be able to get another definitive 'little person' role?
Is Verne Troyer a 'bad ass who knows how 2 partie'?

Mainly just posted this 2 post videos of Verne Troyer drunk

Kinda feel bad. Maybe he shouldn't be at an electro party / rave.

Maybe he'll end up making another sex tape or something.

'I'm hornie'

Does Verne Troyer know how 2 partie?
Would u rather party with Steve Bro or Vernster?
Should Verne cut down on the partying?
Should Steve throw down an intervention?

Take care of yalls selves, Steve + Vernie.

New 3D documentary abt how Justin Bieber is the Lord of the Tweens

Posted: 26 Oct 2010 09:34 AM PDT

I am the Lord of the Tweens
Celebrate my life
Celebrate my existence
I will be around 4evr
I will copy the career arc of Justin Timberlake

Celebrate my life
I could have any piece of ass in the world
in 3d
Writing hits

I am larger than life
I'm JBieb

Wish I could have been JBieb when I was a tween
Get my choice of any piece of ass in the world
Get my swerve on
with any1 ages 11-45

Feeling sad
Wish I was famous
a tween sensation
Wouldn't have 'real problems' right now
Would already have a 3d documentary abt my life
and how awesome I am
Feel like my self-concept would be hella chill/down2earth

I truly 'overcame' very middleclass circumstances
and here I am
rich, famous, and under-20 years old
I have inspired many tweens
I hang out with Will Smith's son
I can do whatever the eff I want

Life is hard 4 me though
but it is awesome too
I work hard and I am naturally talented
Plz don't be jealous of me/resent me
I wipe my ass with $100 bills

It feels good 2 be me.
I am Justin Bieber
The Lord of the Tweens

R u gonna go see this documentary?
Do u think the 3d element will really take it over the top?
Is Justin Bieber a virgin?

OKGO can't sell albums so they try 2 sell viral video cameras

Posted: 26 Oct 2010 09:06 AM PDT

From what I understand, bands can no longer make money by 'selling albums', and they must do things to get attention of humans on the internet. Even if u get ppls attention on the internet, it doesn't guarantee that u will make money, so ur best bet is basically to find some corporate sponsor with tons of money to feel like they are 'sponsoring' ur viral product/video/mp3. Even though it cheapens ur product to have a corporate sponsor attached [via Mountain Dew / Converse / Taco Bell], I guess blogs will blog abt u and talk abt the state of the modern mp3 industry.

Anyways, OKGO is some band that went viral in the infancy of youtube video streaming, and unfortunately, ppl have paid attention to them since then, even though they are forgettable alt rock. I think they don't have a record label any more because they wanted to focus on viral videos, so now they had to get Samsung 2 sponsor their viral videos.

Feel sad that the embedded video has less that 7K views.

Hope they help Samsung sell some cameras 2 tweens who want 'HD Content' that 'goes viral'. I think they still resonate with 'the youtube generation', but I don't think those ppl rlly buy music, they just sorta sit on youtube all day and watch tweens covering their favourite songs.

Do u h8 OKGO?
Does OK GO 'get' the modern music industry?
Do u feel bad for them/will they die soon?
Should they just become filmmakers instead of continuing on as a 'band'?
Do u think musicians deserve to make money for viral videos, or just 4 making music?
Should Barry Obama ban Napster/leaked mp3 files?

OP-ED: Snacks the Cat is tired of vibes being harshed

Posted: 26 Oct 2010 08:34 AM PDT

This post was written by Snacks The Cat AKA Tom Hanks.

Hi.

It's me. Snacks the Cat again, the popular cat of the buzzband human Best Coast aka Bethany Cosentino. You can read my previous OP-ED here.

I honestly don't have too much to say, but I need a place to vent. U know how it is--it's difficult when u feel like ur alone. I'm still living in hell. Things aren't going too well and I'm not very happy. The place smells like dank, there are empty Mountain Dew cans everywhere, and Bethanie forgets to feed me all of the time.

Now there is this new cat here, and he is kinda pissed too. Sometimes we poop everywhere just to cause trouble, but they just laugh at us because they are stoned. I don't get any authentic attention or love. Considering running away, becoming an alley cat, but I have been a spoiled upper-middle class cat my entire life. I realize that I live a life of luxury (plus I was already declawed, so I can't fight with other mean cats).

Maybe the point of life isn't to be happy. Maybe it is just about enduring pain & sadness. I don't know how much I can take any more... Watching a bunch of #itgetsbetter videos to try to brighten my spirits.

I am depressed. Sad. I just want the entire bed to myself. I want to be able to chill. I want to be fed on time. I want to be happy. I like it the most when Bethany is out of town, and I get to go to her friend's apartment.

I'm sorry this wasn't interesting. I just want u to feel my pain.

Plz pray for me.
Things aren't going well 4 me right now.
I am cloaked in darkness.

Bye....forever?
Snacks_is_letting_go

goodnite world

Lamestreamers on facebook discover the chillwave genre

Posted: 25 Oct 2010 08:48 PM PDT


Chillwave is a new and exciting genre that existed in 2k9, but now it is kinda dormant, and we are waiting to see how chillwave clashes with 'the big guns' of indie in 2k11. Gonna be a 'huge showdown', and there will be casualties. No1 knows what is going to happen.

So even though ur super relevant and ovr chillwave, there is an entire genre of humans who are still discovering it. They are like 'wow, these vibes are so amazing, have yall heard of this shit?' Glad facebook exists so we can discover these vibes.

Check out these laggard chillwavers vibing out on facebook

First some bro embeds the hit mp3 by Washed out "Feel it All Around." He is like, "Have yall heard of this band, they are called Washed Out. For some reason they remind me of Panda Bears.... I could rlly use some Neon Indians, yall!"

Then he comes right back and embeds another video. No idea wtf he embedded, but was probably something hella lame/hella chill.

Then some bro is like "Listen fggtzz, we call this lofi electro. U should check out Toro Y Moi. I'm the shit. Yall blow."

Another bro is like "Have yall heard of the Small Black? Heard they are chillwave, yall. Love buzzbands"

Then an EPIC BRO comes along for a chill moment, and is like "THEY CALL THIS SHIT CHILLWAVE BITCHES! PEACE I'M OUTTIE EFFING LAMESTREAMERS. SEE YALL IN HELLLLLL. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I'M THE SHIT. RIDING CHILLWAVES WITH MY BROS. EFF EVERY1. GONNA DEACTIVATE FACEBOOK AND START CHILLBOOK. L8RS.'

********
Is chillwave 'dead'?
Will chillwave live on 4evr?
R u excited for indie vs chillwave in 2k11?
Who is ur fave chillwave band/the band most likely 2 'live 4evr'?
Do u talk abt buzzbands/relevant genres on facebook?
Will lamestreamers ever talk about rape gaze on facebook?

Submit ur lamestreamer sightings utilizing the ALT REPORT TIPS SUBMISSION FORM.

ALTERNATIVE HALLOWEEN WEEK: PRESENTED BY HIPSTER RUNOFF

Posted: 25 Oct 2010 06:08 PM PDT

Searching....
Searching 4 an authentic Halloween experience...

Who am I going 2 be for Halloween?
The 1 night per year where I can be some1 other than myself
escaping
Pretending I am a relevant/buzzworthy/famous/historical/fictional human being

This is the beginning
of a Halloween Spooktacular
on HIPSTER RUNOFF
searching for authentic Halloween Costumes

"Boo" said the alt ghost
"MMMMMRRRRPHHH SPOOOKIE" said the rape gaze artist
"AHHHHH" said Alice Glass
"The Suburbs" said Win Butler

"We are going trick or treating" in the Suburbs.

THIS IS ALT HALLOWEEN WEEK
////THE SEARCH FOR AN AUTHENTIC ALT HALLOWEEN COSTUME

Should I dust off my "Where the Wild Things Are" costume?

Should I buy a plaid shirt and be AnCo?

What questions do u have abt alt Halloween? Carles will be conducting a 'Special Halloween Edition Mailbag' later in the week

What r u gonna be 4 Halloween?
What is an authentic costume?
Should u stick with a mnstrm costume or an alt costume?
"Should I be Joustice 4 Halloween?" -Carles, 2k8
Who will be the popular alt celebrity costume of the year??

PREVIOUSLY

The Best Halloween Costumes of 2k9

The Best Halloween Costumes of 2k8