Tuesday, April 27, 2010

HIPSTER RUNOFF

HIPSTER RUNOFF

Curb Your Enthusiasm Porn Parody

Posted: 27 Apr 2010 04:34 PM PDT


From what I understand, it is important for porn studios to make parodies of popular tv series and movies in order to keep their brands relevant. It is a good way to inspire mainstream blog coverage of their studio production company, since you can’t just advertise for porn in traditional ways. It seems like this porn parody of Larry David’s “Curb Your Enthusiasm” was targeted at intelligent comedy consumers who still like to masturbate while watching zany pornography.

Do people who watch Curb Your Enthusiasm watch a lot of porn?
Does Larry David make u hornie?
Is the acting in ‘Curb Your Enthusiasm’ just as shitty as porn acting?
Do u think the plot lines in this porn parody are as ‘genius’ / ‘absurd’ as a Seinfeld / Curb plot?
Are you so alt that u just call the show ‘Curb’?

Do u watch porn?
Do u watch Curb Your Enthusiasm?
Who is the best character? The zany black guy?
Was Larry David funnier/more important to the success of Seinfeld than Jerry Seinfeld?

Would u rather jerk off to an Office porn parody?

Might just watch a parody of ‘Friends’

What porn parody do u want 2 watch?
What is the best television series of all time?
If you could watch a porn parody of a buzzband, which buzzband would you pick?

New M.I.A. song about hating / wanting to kill gingers

Posted: 27 Apr 2010 12:34 PM PDT

Hey yall. After watching M.I.A.’s music video about h8ing gingers, and wanting to wipe them off the planet [link], I decided to guess the lyrics to a song that she might write about how she wants to wipe every famous and non famous red headed person from our Earth.

Killin Em Gingas

written by Maya Arulpragasam (stage name: M.I.A.)

[gun shots]
[sounds of people running + violence]

Gingas, Gingas
Boom boom ba boom le beeem
Gonna shoot up your bitch asses
even u Carrot Top

Give food and money to the poor
US Government is bullshit faggts
Fuck the UK government too
gotta rid the Earth of Prince Harry and his ginga ass

Lady Di and Prince Charles
paparazzi crash
bitches and ho’s

[gun shots]

Molly Ringwald.
Boom. Ur Dead

Danny Bonnaduce gonna get taken down
boom

Lindsay Lohan. u better dye ur hair bitch

Gingas Gingas
Fallin down
boom shacka lacka
we takin down da government
burnin down da white haus

tweet boom tweet boom ba boom

Ariel from Little Mermaid
gonna drown the mutha fuckin ginger
in a sea of bullets
cartoon violence in real life

gonna strangle Shaun White with his gold medals
snow boardin ain’t a real sport

Julianne Moore gonna go down
Big Lebowski ass bitch
gonna get boom de boomed

X files Lady gonna disappear
Gingers be goin down gingers be down down

Eric Stoltz in the movie Mask
ur the 1 I’m gonna take down

Gingas Gingas
Crash like paper planes
Put gingers in internment camps
and execute them
1 by 1
or in a gas chamber

Danny Bonaduce roid rage

Gonna take u down like the lil ginger bitch u r inside
boom boom cmon cmon de boom


CONTINUE READING this anti-ginger manifesto

Debra Messing from Will and Grace
Don’t mind the gay guys
but h8 u when ur hair is tinted red

Red Head Twins from Harry Potter
gonna use my black magik on u

Kathy Bates, big ol lady
gonna choke u with a hot dog

Gingas be goin down
even non famous ones

Gingas gonna be wiped off this planet

Bitch with big tits from Mad Men be goin down

Eff u #TeamCoco
I watch Leno -eee – oo -ee -oo

Carrot top can’t ball over all

Killen Em Gingas
with we guns and we land mines

h8 too

gonna boom boom this Asian Albino

Wipin out entire families
like the American Government

no1 is safe
cuz we killin em mutha fuckin gingas linga singas wingas
get yo guns up
ginga kill rap
ginga killaz
killen em kingas

Good bye feeble gingers
yall had a good life

[gun shots]
[audio sample of Barrack Obama + JFK]
[inaudible yells by M.I.A., Santogold, Diplo, and Rye Rye]

Do u think M.I.A. h8s gingers?
If M.I.A.’s lyrics + message get too violent, will her music devolve into horrorcore?
Is M.I.A. a juggalo?
Which ginger would u wipe off the planet?
What is ur favourite element of M.I.A. songs? The gun shots? The inaudible banter? The incoherent slang?
Who is your least famous ginger person?
Would yall rather get rid of or get rid of gingers?
Is M.I.A.’s album going to be the #1 album of 2k10?

Is M.I.A.’s violent popup ad the most annoying internet ad of all time?

Posted: 27 Apr 2010 08:34 AM PDT


Yesterday, the Alt Report Robot visited the popular Gen X alt website Viceland.com. My internet experience was interrupted by an interactive advertisement that popped up in the center of the screen. I saw a ginger boy running, and then he blew up, and then his blood spelled “M.I.A.” At first I was confused, but then I remembered that M.I.A. created a violent music video where some ginger bro was blown up [link].

Do u think this type of online is ‘hella annoying’?
Do u like browsing websites and ’seeing shit pop up’?
Are popup ads the most important form of in our lifetime?

It seems like M.I.A. is jonesing really hard to promote this violent meme. I wonder if Interscope has her back, or if they are ‘mortgaging the house’ with her release. Has any1 figured out if there is a metaphorical message behind her videos, or is she just trying to get our attention so we buy her album?

Is the song “Born Free” poppy enough for you?

If you had a relevant alternative website, would you rather sell high priced banner ads, or would you just give the artist the login to your twitter account with over a million followers, kinda like Pitchfork did for M.I.A [link].
Wonder which 1 was the right move, in terms of ‘keeping their readers happy.’

From what I understand, websites are in constant fear of appearing to have ’sold out.’ In addition, they can’t do things that weaken their editorial trust with readers. Seems like M.I.A. is probably ‘pushing the limits’ with Vice and Pitchfork. Do u feel uncomfortable with modern internet ? Should we just ’sack it up’ and enjoy the modern world?

What is the most annoying advertisement of all time?
Have u ever won something free on the internet [via popup ad]?
Are you an M.I.A. supporter?
Do you support M.I.A.’s war against the gingers?
Is M.I.A. more authentic than Lady Gaga?
Will M.I.A.’s album debut at #1?
Do u know a good popup blocker + spyware detector to protect my PC from viruses and trojans?
Do users respond positively or negatively to intrusive advertisements on websites?

This posting includes an audio/video/photo media file: Download Now

A shitload of California Tween Ravers attend a Steve Aoki concert

Posted: 27 Apr 2010 06:34 AM PDT

Photos by the cobrasnake:
http://thecobrasnake.com/partyphotos/ravesafe/index.html


I kinda want to move to Southern California, so that I can experience the cornucopia of people + electro minorities whose personal brands are on full display at relevant electro events. I think Steve Aoki had some sort of concert that was part of the HARDfest party brand series. I think that is probably the most successful party brand in Southern California, basically the mini-Coachella for teens who can’t afford a Coachella 3 day pass.

It seems like you either ask your parents to take you to the movies, or you tell your parents that you are spending the night with your friend who has bad parents, then they drop you off at an electro show.

Feel worried about these kids, like they have minimal parental supervision. No1 who told them to drink water before they experimented with drugs + alcohol. Now they are all dehydrated

Just want a meaningful electro Girls Night Out. Do u think they had their parents drop them off like this, or did they just wear a baggy tshirt over their slutty outfits?

Wanna exchange bracelets?

Worried that this relationship is ‘barely legal.’

Need an electro-bromance with one of my closest bros

Need an entry level raver / alt girl

I wonder if ‘electro in California’ is sort of like ‘high schoolers with a punk personal brand’ in every other part of America.

Goo goo gaa gaa. We’re babies

“Listen Bro. We’re gonna dump her lifeless body on her front doorstep, then drive away, okay?”

Srsly tho. Have yall ever taken advantage of some1 who was not ‘in their right mind’?

or do you get so effed up that you couldn’t even ‘perform’ if u had the opportunity to take advantage of a passed out girl?

Is Steve Aoki the Electro God of California?

Connected with my bros after we touched Steve Aoki

‘I love my boyfriend.’

Does every ‘all ages’ event in California turn into a rave?
Do California Mexis + AZNs make the scene better?
Is HARDfest the #1 party brand in California?
Did u ever go to a rave when u were an unsupervised teenager?
Have yall ever accidentally gone to an indie concert thinking it was a rave?
Do u like to get half naked when you go 2 raves?

What should I wear to a rave?

Pitchfork gives Crystal Castles MP3 “Best New Music” Status

Posted: 27 Apr 2010 06:02 AM PDT

Link: http://pitchfork.com/reviews/tracks/11885-celestica/


Pitchfork Media, a popular critical web magazine, gave a new Crystal Castles MP3 for the song “Celestica” the official label of BEST NEW MUSIC, meaning that it is the ‘best song’ on Crystal Castles’ upcoming album. I am not sure if the song sounds ‘good’ or ‘bad.’ I feel like it probably just sounds the most like what consumers expect Crystal Castles to sound like, therefore it is ‘the best song’ on the album.

The song is embedded in this youtube video.

Does this song sound ‘effing amazing’?
Has Crystal Castles grown up?
Will Crystal Castles pull an MGMT and make something kinda weird?
Does Crystal Castles deserve a higher score than chillwave albums, even though they are probably just going to make a similar album 2 their first album?
R u in <3 with Alice Glass?

Has Alice Glass evolved as a singer?
Is Crystal Castles gonna make ‘mad bank’ off this album?
Is “Celestica” about Toyota Celicas?

Does Crystal Castles need to be 70% more poppy if they want 2 crossover into the Pete Wentz-o-sphere of lost alt teens?