Thursday, September 16, 2010

HIPSTER RUNOFF

HIPSTER RUNOFF

Indie singer Heidi Montag tries to ride slutwave, uses implants 2 float on chillwaves

Posted: 16 Sep 2010 03:15 PM PDT

Link: http://www.hollywoodtuna.com/?p=42803


Trying so hard
2 ride the slutwave
getting huge implants
tig ol bitties

utilizing them as ‘life preservers’
and/or conceptual ‘floaties’
That help my body 2 stay afloat
in this big, beautiful ocean of life.

tig bitties
perfect body
no worries in life
except riding chillwaves

Staying young 4evr
Nvr gonna die
always will be mad beautiful.

Just want to be part of a celebrity couple
have a hit show on the MTV network

‘dear lord’
Need to motorboat those huge, firm breasteses
Stick my ‘peen’ between them
Feel ‘alive’/erect 4 the first time in a long time.

Want to ride chillwaves
utilizing implant life preservers
so worried abt the death of chillwave
but maybe it will stay alive forever
if we < embed > flotation devices within our bodies

Do yall think looks ‘more alt’ / ‘more beautiful’ than she used 2?

Would yall rather ride slutwaves or chillwaves with her?

Local Hipster in Brooklyn hit by a bus 2 be alt

Posted: 16 Sep 2010 12:30 PM PDT

Link: http://gothamist.com/2010/09/15/woman_struck_by_school_bus_in_brook.php

Just read a headline about some woman being hit by a bus in Brooklyn. Not sure what the scenario is, but assume that she was a ‘hipster’ and I will use this post as an opportunity to ‘bash hipsters’ for being consumer ass holes who are just slaves 2 trends. Might feel kinda bad if it wasn’t actually a ‘hipster’, and just a ‘regular human’ who is trying to stay alive + provide for her family.

Seems kinda like some bummer news. Soo weird that a car accident happened in Brookslyn when I thought every1 there rode fixed gear bikes.

A woman is in critical condition after being hit by an empty school bus in Gravesend yesterday afternoon. The woman was carrying groceries while crossing Ocean Parkway near Avenue X. She had the light, but it changed when she was halfway across the street, and the Grandpa’s Bus Co. Inc. bus crashed into her.

Wonder if she was on her way home from an organic vegan popup shop. Probably had her iPhone on too loud [via technology]. Probs listening to Vampire Weekend, MGMT, or another maltstream band.

Those hipsters… when will they ever learn….

One witness told the Daily News, “I heard the noise and went to help her. She was already bleeding from [her] head and mouth.”

Probably was fake blood that she was using just to ‘be unique.’ Wish they’d realize that people bleed every day, and u can’t be an individual and that trends are just recycled. They are all trying to be unique artists that they don’t even follow street crossing rules.

Do u think this story was about a ‘hipster’ or just about a ‘regular human’?
Should more articles ‘bash’ hipsters who ‘live in Brooklyn’?
Do ‘regular ppl’ live in Brooklyn? Read a lot abt it on the internet as a ‘hipster mecca.’
Did yall ride the bus to school in suburbia?
Are bus drivers careless + irresponsible?
Should Grandpa’s Bus Co be ‘put out of business’ 4 hitting people?
Is it unchill 2 run over humans with school buses?

NSFW XXX Photo: Steve Aoki nip slip

Posted: 16 Sep 2010 10:01 AM PDT

Link: http://twitter.com/thecobrasnake/status/24660315631


It seems like the Cobrasnake bro just tweeted out this picture of relevant alt electro DJ Steve Aoki. Seems to be chilling hard on a flight to a high paying DJ gig, flying in first class. Seems relaxed, chillin hard, looking kinda sexual. What do u think he is dreaming about?

R u turned on by this nip slip?
Does it ‘count’ when a bro has a nip slip?
Are nip slips only ‘hot’ when there is a perfect alt tittie on the horizon?
Was it unchill of the cobra bro to take this pic of his bro?
Do yall miss Steve Aoki?
Do yall miss nip slips?
Are nip slips ‘sexier’ than seeing ‘an entire tittie’?
Should bros wear huge t-shirts to prevent nip slippage?

Toro Y Moi ‘launches’ new ‘banger’ dance project. Is Les Sins the new Justice?

Posted: 16 Sep 2010 09:06 AM PDT

Link: http://pitchfork.com/news/40069-toro-y-moi-announces-tour-new-dance-project/


Apparently, Chaz Bundick of Toro Y Moi has like 100 different sound projects, but Toro Y Moi was the most successful because it occured within the expanding chillwave bubble. In an effort to ‘diversify’ his portfolio of soundprojects he seems to be launching his ‘dance project’ called . Had already been listening 2 some rare b-sides for a while now, but ‘excited’ to see him take this product to market + focus on it. Really need some of our best indie talent to generate more memes for us so that we don’t ‘go under.’

In other Bundick news, the man is launching a new project called that is neither chill nor wave. Instead, would sound at home on French filter disco label Ed Banger.

Sorta wonder if this means that ‘chillwave’ is dead, or if Chaz Bundick is ‘too talented’ to let a genre ‘corner in’ his sound projects/artistic ambitions.

Do u like these MP3s?

– Lina

– Youth Gone

Does have an opportunity to ‘be bigger’ than Toro Y Moi?
Will Chaz Bundick make ‘mad bank’ on the DJ circuit?
who do u like more: or Torbros?

Miss u Ed Banger Records. Wonder if they should try to ride some chillwaves, export that shit 2 France.

wonder if this means ‘bangers’ will come back in 2k11.
Do u miss Ed Banger?
Will we see a Justice remix of Toro Y Moi / ?
Is Toro Y Moi ‘the new Justice’?
Do yall miss Justice?
Will ‘dance music’ be relevant again in 2k11?
Will ‘bloghouse’ return soon?
Is it important for artists to diversify their output so that their sound doesn’t become ‘outdated’?
When will the chillwave bubble burst?

The Arcade Fire’s Win Butler retires, says his band is better than the Beatles

Posted: 16 Sep 2010 08:30 AM PDT

Link: http://www.spin.com/articles/arcade-fire-411-indies-biggest-band
Link: http://pitchfork.com/news/40071-echo-chamber-arcade-fires-win-butler


Just read some article about the , and how they are ‘the #1 band in indie’ or something. Anyways, pretty boring because bands don’t really have anything 2 say except ‘buy our album cuz we love it, worked hard on it, and we are authentic.’ The ‘shocking’ part of the interview came because , the lead singer of the interview apparently ‘retired’ or something. Not sure if this is bad news or good news.

Here is the quote when he said he is gonna retire and get a job at a State Farm Insurance agency in the_Suburbs.

“I can’t see myself doing this 10 years from now. We’ve been a band now as long as the Beatles, and pop music is a young man’s game.”

Damn bro. Can’t believe Win is ‘hanging it up’, giving up the opportunity to inspire alts all around the world. Wonder if he is already retired, or if he is gonna try to write one more ‘epic’ indie album that is ‘better than the Beatles.’ Can’t believe it. Hope he is actually retired as of today, because I get super annoyed when indie stars like James Murphy say they are ‘gonna retire’ but then just keep churning out albums because they are ‘addicted’ to relevancy / money / commercial opportunities.

Do u think should compare his band 2 the Beatles, or is that an ‘ass hole’ thing 2 do? Because his band has existed longer than the Beatles, does that mean they are ‘better’?

Is it ur dream to be in an indie band and get on magazine covers that say u r the #1 band in indie?

Is Vampire Weekend the #1 indie band?
Are the Kings of Leon the #1 indie band?
Do u think the will ever really retire?
Do u envision the playing until they are 50 or 60 years old, kind of like how old people still get pumped for Bruce Springsteen or Paul McCartney?
Did actually retire?
At what age do u plan to retire? 25? 45? 65?
Need to start a pension plan/401k for my chillwave sound proj.